Balance



 Hey folks, I'm in a bit of a jam and need your help. I've been putting together a storyboard project and do not know the portfolio level it should be shown in a movie format. Here is a frame that has just been drawn to convey the story idea.



Here is a much more touched up version that I would have in the final composite. What do you all think? Too much? Any feedback will help!

Cheers,

-H

7 comments:

kim said...

Hi Haylee,
Not sure if you remember me, I met you at CTN:) My advice to you on this is to concentrate on where the viewer is looking and where the primary piece of information is, and make sure those points are clean and clear. Things like facial expressions and relevant objects are that are important to make the story read. It looks like you cleaned up the background a little here, which I don't think is necessary. If the background is already established, and the attention is in the foreground, spend more time on the character. Also, if you look through your boards and an element is confusing, clarify that element so that the viewer doesn't spend time trying to figure out what it is. If you have the time, cleaner is better, just make sure the attention is where you want it to be. Hope that helps, good luck with your thesis, it looks like its coming along great!! :)

Alejandro Gonzalez said...

Hey Haylee. I'm not sure what your asking. But remember the rule of thirds when it comes to film. What she's holding in her hands seems important. So try not to have it so close to the edge of the screen. Hope that helps.

Louise Smythe said...

Hey Haylee - I asked this question at CTN and a lot of the answers were the same - loose drawings that have clarity in staging are most important. So while I think the clean-up you did is very nice, the first one has enough info to get the shot. I'd say cleaning up is great if you have time, but loose and clear seems to be the common answer I got from studios and artists at CTN. Good luck on your thesis! I'm doin' boards for mine, so I may ask you for advice as well ;) Good luck!

Haylee said...

Kim: I would be able to remember you better with a photo, but it seems your profile is blocked. Nonetheless, thank-you for your wonderful input!

Alejandro: Thank-you for the reminder. It's easy to forget even the most golden of rules!

Louise: You can ask as much as you'd like, I only hope I can help!

kim said...

lol, check facebook:) and you're welcome!

james_oshea3 said...

like what is said before, and things to keep in mind,
For staging:
-place the camera where you place the audience. Close ups make you feel connected; long shots make you feel uninvolved.
-Find places to add Secondary Action
-Depth
--Flat Space for comedy
--Deep space for drama
-Place camera for best angle and emotional beat.
-Sometimes the best way to sell a character's expression or attitude is to not show their
face at all.

...just passing by and I really dig your stuff. ;P your board that's posted seems appropriate for feature format 1.85:1

you can always post your storyboards for a more thorough critique on http://www.storyboardart.org/?page_id=59

michaelamos said...

For me it would be the top one. The drawing is looser and less caught up in the details. The only thing I would ask is if the person in the desk is important? Should I be looking there? If so, the clean up with the larger pool of light around the desk does help focus my attention on what is happening in the BG.